Writing Tip #1

*This advice comes from an amateur writer, someone who does not get paid to give out tips to anyone who may want some. It would be killer if I got paid to spout nonsense at people (well, it's not nonsense, but you get my point), but sadly that is not the case.

Today's topic: the dreaded grammar...*bum bum bum*

Oh...I could go on and on about why grammar is important, BUT here's why I won't: it's not the main thing you have to worry about when writing. I see a lot of writers giving others a hard time because their grammar is not flawless. "GET A BETA! EDIT THIS CRAP! BE A MAN AND DO MANLY THINGS LIKE ME!" Oh, I'm sorry: who goes over the book before it is sent to a publishing? Who fixes the mistakes? Who edits what the author has written, sends it back to the author for one final rundown, and then lets the agent try to sell it to a publishing house? You get where I'm going with this?

Not even people with a PhD in creative writing have flawless grammar; I once heard my old codger of an English professor say, "AND DEN I WAS LEECKING IT LIKE DIS!" (Note: he is very much from the United States, English is his first language, and he also hates Justin Bieber with a passion. Gotta love Bro. Fred) Don't give yourself a brain hemorrhage about grammar; write what you think reads smoothly. If you must, read it aloud to see if it sounds like something an educated person would say without receiving worried stares from colleagues.

Things to remember about grammar:

-it doesn't dictate other stuff such as punctuation and spelling (as some people like to think), only indirectly

-verbs and verb tenses, nouns, usage, etc. all fall under grammar

-though important, it should not take priority over everything else in your writing (I will get to this in a later blog), especially if you aim to write and publish a book one day

-if your native language is not the one you're writing in, don't take offense from other authors when they say you "can't write" because they are being just a little too judgmental and need to back the hell off reflect on how they will look if they go off on someone who knows very little (insert language here)

-self-proclaimed "Grammar Nazis"(I'm about to get very unprofessional at the moment) are total and complete douchebags who have never gone through the process of publishing something. I get where they're coming from, and I get that their intentions are initially good, but as Alan Grant once said, "Some of the worst things imaginable have been done with the best intentions." Yes, having bad grammar reflects poorly on a person. Yes, it causes people to doubt your writing abilities. No, it does not mean you are stupid/retarded/mentally incapable. Anyone who has the balls to tell you that will either be anonymous or so egotistical that his or her head has the capacity to hold a baker's dozen of my beautiful Maserati GT.

Any questions? Feel free to leave a comment :) That is all. TTFN!

~Andi~